5 Rights Nobody Can Take Away From You.
We’re so caught up in our everyday lives that we forget who we really are. We forget our purpose, our dreams, our rights.
If we never allow ourselves to stop and question what we’re really doing, we’ll get easily distracted by other people’s goals, needs and expectations. The external noise will influence us so deeply and silently that we’ll believe we’re the driver of our life when, in reality, we’re just a passenger.
At least, that’s what has happened to me. I was so absorbed in what was expected of me that I didn’t even tried to understand what I expected of myself.
I’ve come to the realization that I’ve spent most of my life adapting to norms and values I don’t even resonate with. I’ve been doing what everyone wanted me to do instead of listening to my intuition, and I’ve been ignoring my emotional and spiritual needs instead of respecting them.
And the worst part is, most of us are programmed to act this way. We’re programmed to follow a certain path, regardless of how we feel about it. We’re programmed to chase happiness instead of creating our own.
But this only happens when we don’t remind ourselves that we have, indeed, the right to be the driver. The right to follow our own path.
These are the rights I want you to remember.
1. The right to set and hold boundaries.
Unfortunately, our society doesn’t teach us what boundaries are, nor does it acknowledge the importance of setting them. In fact, when someone sets a boundary, we tend do perceive them as selfish.
But boundaries are an essential part of any healthy relationship. Emotionally mature individuals naturally express their boundaries and will have no problem when it comes to respecting yours. They will honor your personal space and admire your self-expression.
How many times do you say yes when you want to say no? How many times have you neglected your own well-being while prioritizing the needs of others? These are some signs that you need to set some boundaries.
Remind yourself that you have the right to express your needs and feelings; to choose what parts of yourself you share, who you engage with and, most importantly, you have the right to feel angry and speak up if your boundaries were disrespected or violated.
2. The right to express your genuine feelings and emotions.
As long as I can remember, I’ve been the kind of person that stays quiet and lets others do the talking.
For years, I thought this was an innate trait of mine, but developing my self-awareness has made me realize that there was a subconscious reason behind it: the belief that I was not worthy of expressing myself.
As a child, I was taught that vulnerability, authenticity and self-expression should always be discouraged. I was taught to hide my true feelings and be as neutral as I could possibly be — otherwise, there would be conflict between my parents and that’s the nightmare of every child.
If we don’t identify and reverse these unspoken rules, they’ll dictate every day of our lives to the point where we feel miserable, drained and disconnected from our true self.
3. The right to end relationships that do not serve you.
In my healing journey, one of the epiphanies I had was how most of my friendships didn’t serve me at all. I tried to ignore this feeling, but the more I ignored it, the stronger it got and, at some point, I had to let them go.
More often than not, we stay in relationships out of convenience. We share our time with people we’ve known for years without really reflecting on what these relationships bring into our life. Be honest: do they bring you joy and unconditional support? Do they make you feel loved and heard?
Maybe your friends aren’t necessarily toxic or draining, but they don’t support your growth either. Anyway, you have the right to choose who you want in your life and who you share your precious energy with.
As we evolve, our goals and priorities change. We can either ignore it and try to stay the same — which will delay our own growth — or we can embrace it and accept it.
I know how difficult it is to admit to yourself that you need to let some friends go, but at the end of the day, by letting them go you’re making space for new people to come into your life — people who will love to see you stretch your wings and who will rejoice in your success.
4. The right to spend your time and energy on what you find important.
We live in a largely unconscious society that only finds value in the material, palpable world, without ever getting in touch with the most important part of our lives: our inner world.
It’s your inner world that tells you if something aligns with your values and it’s worth pursuing, or if someone makes you feel genuinely good. It’s your inner world that connects you with your intuition; that lets you know if you’re following the right path. Without it, you’re like a boat with no compass.
Don’t let anyone convince you that creating, daydreaming or meditating are unproductive activities that lead you nowhere, because your worth is not based on your productivity. Your interests, your emotions and gut feelings matter. Your sense of purpose matters.
Clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson says,
“Think about all the accomplished people who got that way by valuing and giving deep attention to their inner experiences. We support that self-valuing in famous actors, Nobel scientists, great musicians and world-renown artists. Nobody ever asks if such people should be paying so much attention to their inner world. We never question if it’s okay for them to safeguard their time and energy from other people’s demands. We should do no less for ourselves.”
5. The right to follow your intuition — even when everybody else says you’re wrong.
Here’s the thing: nobody will tell you to follow your intuition when it comes to making important life decisions, because we’re all programmed to ignore, deny and neglect our intuition.
The world we live in has been built on ego-based foundations that profit from your lack of confidence in your true self. On the other hand, paying attention to your inner voices will lead you towards a path of self-discovery that will make you realize that you are the most important person in your life.
This realization is an act of rebellion in itself. Because when you trust yourself, you won’t listen to other people’s opinions and judgements regarding how you should live your life.
Instead, you turn inward and search for guidance — and you follow it.
Behind every success story is the realization that we don’t have to be a victim of our circumstances.
When you decide you’re no longer a victim, you’re not only claiming your rights — you’re taking full responsibility for your life. You’re saying “I acknowledge my conditioning, I forgive myself for my past and now it’s time for me to use these lessons to grow”.
Don’t ever underestimate how powerful your rights are.